6/29/11

errr.. Postgraduate?

It used to be..

"I can't wait for these 4 torturous years to be over.."

"They're all slave drivers i tell you! "

"It will all be worth it once i graduate.."

And now suddenly its..

"Oh god I need a job.. ><"

"Boh?! 3.75 for overseas scholarship?? Are they nuts!?"

"TOEFL... IELTS anyone??"


Yup. It's finally postgraduate -__-v

I guess the shinning light at the end of the tunnel really wasn't all it was cut out to be. 4 years of looking forward to the day when they name you a university graduate. Instead of that breath of fresh air, you suddenly find yourself pinned beneath a huge landslide with your rib cage pressing against your lungs making breathing virtually impossible as the cells in your body frantically scream for oxygen.

Ok.. hyperbola. But still. Bliss was only during the period of denial where you thought "i'm finally free.. i can finally get some rest.. and life starts now ^^" This tentatively should only last you 1-2 months, by which you will slowly notice personal funds dwindle in your bank account as apposed to peternakan lemak yang semakin meningkat.

Maybe this isn't the case for some of us, lucky enough  to land good jobs and grab opportunities to further studies. For me, i guess i needed some time to think. To really really think. Because though i'm not overly proud to admit, on the day of my final paper of my final exam, i was totally and utterly blank. Like 4 years had totally used up my reserve and i was left empty with not enough brain juice to worry about my future. And it kinda scared me 0_o.

After mauling the thought and letting it ferment over the course of 2 months I finally realized that, 
1) yes i must continue on with my masters no matter what. 
2) that it would be coursework 
3) that i would definitely want to do it abroad.

Now of course there are a whole lot of discrepancies between what we "want" and what we "can have" Like the fact that though i had to fight my way for a second class upper distinction with nails and teeth, JPA will only entertain first class graduates for a scholarship overseas T-T. Or the fact that to postpone my contract with JPA for further studies, i must first have an offer letter from a university abroad. This however takes time seeing that many if not all oversea courses require me to obtain IELTS or TOEFL qualifications among others. So reporting immediately is not exactly a viable option -_-v

*sigh* Nevertheless in the back of my mind i am fully aware that many have preceded me in this struggle and that i need to keep my head up if i want to dream large.. Thus begins the winded road to success. And i though getting my degree was tough. <_<

So for the moment i have found myself a job in between course hunting and obtaining an offer letter. I had originally applied for a part time in Tesco (cuz it was close by). But after a bit of reflection i applied once more to Double Lion -_-v. Only because working experience in a related field could do me some good in the future no matter how much work there is. Possible prospects of working with Mr. Lam and his consultancies is also a plus. Aside from this the pay scheme is also definitely higher since i applied for the Quality Assurance post. I'm still a bit clueless on the salary though. Being a fresh graduate without experience... Hopefully this arrangement will only last till next year at most.  

Oh lord just thinking about it makes me exhausted. But then there's always that little voice inside me that keeps whispering,

" It'll all be worth it once you graduate."
    
<3



No comments: